Raising My Rainbow

Starred review from June 17, 2013
In her first book, Duron comes out of the “mommy blog” closet with an optimistic and delightful memoir of her family’s process of understanding, supporting, and celebrating their gender-creative son, C.J., who prefers Barbies to trucks and princesses to pirates. The story of the phenomenal growth that this mother exhibits as she tries to do what she thinks is best—steering C.J. toward gender-neutral toys, navigating ever-changing rules about what is okay for him to wear in public—is humorous and light, even when the issues involved are heavy. Duron employs a range of resources as she tries to understand her son and how best to parent him, including speaking to her gay brother and his transgendered friend, finding LGBTQ resources on the Internet, and discovering peers when she begins publishing a blog about C.J. (RaisingMyRainbow.com). In Duron’s story, parents will find support for a “love them, not change them” style of parenting, optimism about the outcomes for their gender-creative children, sympathy for the difficulties of parenting, and an affirmation of the appropriateness and necessity for fierce advocacy. Duron’s call for compassion should be heeded by educators, caregivers, and neighbors—an open heart, a desire to listen and learn, and a willingness to accommodate go a long way in doing well by someone who differs from your expectations. Agent: Kari Stuart, ICM Partners.

July 1, 2013
A memoir about raising a gender-creative child. Like most parents, Duron and her husband had certain expectations about who their sons would grow up to be, but when their younger son, C.J., discovered and fell in love with Barbie, they had to slowly begin changing their ideas. C.J. liked dolls, his favorite colors were pink and purple, and he enjoyed dressing up in girls' clothes--all atypical behaviors for a 3-year-old male. Having grown up with a brother who is homosexual, Duron was on the lookout for potentially gay behavior in C.J. It was only as C.J. continued to cross-dress and then announced one day to his father that when he grew up, he was going to be a girl, that Duron realized she might have a gender-nonconforming child. The author honestly and humorously expresses the delight and dismay her family lived through as they watched and adjusted to the increasingly interesting and sometimes very awkward moments of life with C.J. Like all good parents, Duron and her husband didn't squelch C.J's desires but encouraged him to become who he was meant to be, allowing him to have princess-themed birthday parties and "girl" toys from Santa Claus while ignoring the looks and comments of neighbors and the parents of classroom friends. As the first few years passed and C.J.'s behavior continued on the gender-nonconforming spectrum, Duron searched for information on how to safely raise an LGBTQ child. When she couldn't find as much help as she needed, she decided to blog about her experiences in order to connect with and help others in this same situation. Many decisions still lie ahead--for example, hormone therapy and/or surgery for C.J., as well as the need to address the bullying both sons have received--and the author tackles these issues head-on with intelligence and compassion. A heartfelt examination of raising a boy who wants to be a girl.

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March 1, 2014

When Duron's son C.J. didn't outgrow the experimental "phase" many toddlers enjoy, instead announcing he was going to be a girl, she and her husband encouraged "C.J. to be C.J.," while trying to make his life safe and happy. "Mommy blogger" Duron soon began writing in order to provide support to other parents raising a gender nonconforming child.

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