Long Days, Short Years

July 1, 2022

Physician Bomback's (medicine, Columbia Univ. Coll. of Physicians and Surgeons) work on modern parenthood takes on many prevalent topics, including economic anxiety, social pressures, and the tension between careers and family life. His narrative also reveals the internal pressures that parents face to become the best they can be in that role, while recognizing the limits of their resources, patience, and personalities. With a somewhat loose organizational structure, this book by Bomback (the author of essay collection Doctor) covers the history of parenting advice, including the formidable Dr. Spock, the divisive and physician-criticized On Becoming Babywise (a Christianity-based guide to infant sleep training), and more recent works by the likes of economist Emily Oster and journalist Pamela Druckerman. Bomback also shares stories of his own family and raising three children with his wife, also a doctor. Sections addressing gender differences in parenting expectations and the prevalence of childhood diagnoses, especially autism and attention deficit disorder, are among the most compelling. VERDICT Though it's difficult to parse Bomback's writing into one neat takeaway or nugget of wisdom, his empathy and frankness shine through on each page. This book is enjoyable to read and likely to be validating for many parents of young children.--Sarah Bartlett Schroeder

Copyright 2022 Library Journal, LLC Used with permission.

September 19, 2022
“The verb form of parent is a relatively new entry in our collective lexicon, and not a particularly salubrious one,” writes Bomback (Doctor), a physician and “not a particularly good” parent, in this charming outing. As he addresses “how come it can be so much fun to be a parent and yet so incredibly frustrating” to raise children, he lays out a history of parenting styles: there’s “consumer parenting,” for example, in which parents are like “amateur golfers” who are anxious, but “the gear, the getup, the proximity to professionalism make them just a little bit more confident”; helicopter parenting and its opposite, the “free-range parent” movement; as well as “precision parenting,” in which child-rearing approaches are unique to each person’s situation. No matter the approach, Bomback writes, parenting is “the most gender-normative component of modern adulthood.” The author also shares candid personal anecdotes: one sees him confess to his wife how angry his son made him, which led to the realization that he was often a “better doctor than a father.” The author’s determination to be a better parent is evident and motivating, and his wide-ranging study makes for a fascinating look at caretaking philosophies. Parents will find this full of insight.