Primates of Park Avenue

July 20, 2015
When Martin, a social researcher with a background in anthropology, moves from her laid-back West Village neighborhood to the rarefied atmosphere of Manhattan's Upper East Side to be closer to her in-laws, she finds herself in a world of the 1% that is often wholly unwelcoming, inhabited by the noxious and entitled. Though she's definitely not poor, Martin's also not on the level of her new neighbors, who vacation in Aspen for every winter break and think nothing of shelling out $25,000 on kids' finger paintings at a school function. In this memoir, which has been the subject of controversy, Martin approaches her new environs anthropologically, studying the mean mommies and their hierarchies as they relate to each other (silently and intensely at their beloved Physique 57 classes, in which their determination to get cut and look ever younger is palpable) and outsiders like Martin (with hostility, the cut direct, and sometimes outright aggression). However, when she suffers an unexpected tragedy, she receives nothing but kindness from some of the women and gains perspective on what is frivolous and what is truly meaningful. The Midwest-raised Martin is easy for readers to sympathize with as she attempts to find new friends while old ones drift away, and hopes to not be treated as a playground pariah while securing playdates for her son. It's hard, though, to care about her neighborsâand even about Martin when she finds herself coveting an $8,000 Berkin bag in order to show dominance within the pack.

Starred review from June 1, 2015

Martin and her husband are moving from downtown to the Upper East Side of Manhattan in search of a more kid-friendly atmosphere for their son. The neighborhood's excellent schools, proximity to Central Park, and abundance of strollers make it the obvious choice for a small family not ready to leave the island. After their move, however, Martin starts to observe some of the same dominant/submissive behaviors, mating rituals, and rites of passage that she witnessed while studying primatology at Yale University. A Jane Goodall wielding an American Express Black Card, the author leads readers through the hierarchical benchmarks of Upper East Side mothers. VERDICT This anthropological journey into the wilds of New York City's most exclusive zip code could have easily devolved into condescension, but instead it proves that mothers everywhere want the same thing: health and happiness for their progeny. [See Memoir, 4/15/15; ow.ly/MBDf6.]--ES

Copyright 2015 Library Journal, LLC Used with permission.

April 1, 2015
A look at the social rites and rituals of downtown Manhattan through the eyes of former New York Post contributor Martin (Stepmonster: A New Look at Why Real Stepmothers Think, Feel, and Act the Way We Do, 2009, etc.). Coming to a true understanding of any culture involves immersing oneself completely. While it may be uncommon to conduct anthropological research in a place like Manhattan's Upper East Side, the author did just that, moving to the neighborhood with little knowledge of the cultural mores but a hunger to learn more. After settling in to the UES with her husband and son, Martin found herself living the sort of pampered life millions of Americans yearn for. She had a husband at work making good money, a baby, a baby nurse, and time to spend getting mothering right. She also realized that she was very much a fish out of water, since she grew up in the slower, less image-obsessed Midwest. The author applied her educational training to finding her way in this unfamiliar environment (she opens with "Fieldnotes" on such elements as "geographic origins of islanders," "resource acquisition and distribution," and "quadrant affiliation and construction of social identity"). She explores the "social turbocharge" that women experience through owning a Birkin handbag, and she drops plenty of brand names, store names, street names, and other signposts of identification. When Martin allows the narrative to drift more toward science-e.g., her discussion of the juicing/fasting/detoxing fads and how they can shift estrogen levels-the book becomes a useful guide for UES (and other upwardly mobile) women looking inward to understand themselves better-or alternately, to learn the underpinnings of all the maneuverings so as to socially maneuver more efficiently. Sometimes funny but effective for the same reason a Birkin is: it's designed for a certain group of people, and likely them alone.